Couples Therapy, Shelley Davidescu, Anxiety Therapy SD, San Diego TherapistIS HAVING THE SAME ARGUMENT OVER AND OVER RUINING YOUR RELATIONSHIP (and your life)?

Do you find yourself having the same argument with your partner over and over?

Are you feeling disillusioned with your relationship and hopeless that it can get better? Whether you live separate, cohabiting or perhaps you’re in a same sex relationship…blaming, complaining and spending hours fighting is not the way to live.

Couples therapy can help you relieve the tension in your relationship. Couples therapy can also help you feel understood and communicate in a way where you feel heard and understood. If you noticed the spark has disappeared from your relationship, you don’t have fun anymore and the tension between you doesn’t seem to go away, then it’s time to see if couples therapy can help.


If you’re experiencing a significant amount of tension in your relationship, you’re likely feeling a lack of hope. Many couples find that coming in for just a few sessions significantly reduces the tension and helps increase communication so you both can feel heard and understood. Just to be clear, couples therapy can take weeks and sometimes months to make significant progress depending on the challenges your relationship is facing.

Couples Therapy, Shelley Davidescu, Anxiety Therapy SD, San Diego Therapist


Imagine finally communicating in a way where you feel heard and understood. Imagine finally asking for what you need in a way where your partner listens and is able to help you feel valued and cared about. Feeling reconnected with your partner can start to feel great again and couples therapy may even help you reach new levels of intimacy, pleasure and passion in your relationship.


Our work together is collaborative. Sessions involve processing through emotions, challenging thought patterns about your partner, and learning skills on how to communicate in a way where you feel heard and understood.

I also use the Gottman relationship check-up assessment helps me see the exact areas of concern.  Taking the assessment may also allow us to make progress faster. The Gottman relationship check-up assessment tool.

Developed from over 40 years of research with thousands of couples, this relationship assessment relies on intensive, detailed, and evidence-based information on why relationships succeed or fail. The Gottman assessment is a HIPAA compliant questionnaire. The assessment consists of 480 questions about friendship, intimacy, emotions, conflict, values, and trust, as well as parenting, housework, finances, individual areas of concern, and more.

The work we do together helps you develop a real sense of intimacy in your relationship over several weeks. It’s very typical for me to leave you with homework assignments to implement in between sessions. The more consistent you are with treatment the better progress you’ll make.

Couples therapy is a safe place where you can explore what hasn’t been working in a non-judgmental way and begin to lay the foundation for new healthy patterns that allows for deeper intimacy, love and connection.


There are times where couples wait too long to come in for help. In some severe cases, some couples come in for support on how to end the relationship in an amicable way. Couples therapy will also be a huge source of support for when you need to figure out if ending your relationship is the best thing to do. Though the goal in mind is to preserve and significantly improve your relationship sometimes the best decision is to part ways. And while this is a decision I don’t make for you at any point during the treatment, I will support you in sorting through the confusion to reach the best decision for everyone.


 Couples therapy helps improve your relationship in many ways. Couples today are facing many challenges due to living an unbalanced lifestyle, high achieving personal demands and having stressful careers. Couples therapy is a safe place to sort out the confusion of where the stress and arguments come from. Couples therapy is also a place to learn communication skills and safely ask for what you need. In many cases, relationship tension alleviates within weeks and you’re able to experience your relationship through a new perspective.


 Couples therapy is a great place to learn each other’s language. What do I mean by this? Men and women often speak different languages and if you’re experiencing persistent conflict in your relationship, you already know this to be true. In our sessions, I help you understand what your partner is saying and develop effective ways to communicate.


 In Couples therapy show you how to “manage” conflict rather than “resolve” it. Relationship conflict is actually natural and has functional, positive aspects. Understand that there is a critical difference in handling perpetual problems and solvable problems. I will help you sort out the difference between these two. There are times where Couples therapy can get worse before it gets better. Often times, boundaries need to be re-established or new boundaries need to be set. In this case, things can seem even more uncertain but with the help of a trained professional many couples start to see improvement in just a few short weeks or months.


My style is direct yet empathetic. I take the time to listen to your most pressing issues, yet I also focus on what needs to be addressed. I believe it takes tremendous amount of courage to ask for support and I don’t take that lightly. This means when you come in for couples therapy, we don’t waste time and we get right to work.

I’m Gotmman level 1 trained. The Gottman method is research-based using effective interventions and exercises. Your sessions are structured, goal-oriented, and is scientifically-based therapy. The intervention strategies I use are based upon empirical data from Dr. Gottman’s study of more than 3,000 couples. This research shows what actually works to help couples achieve a long-term healthy relationship. The Gottman method was developed to help couples increase respect, closeness and affection. To break through and resolve conflict when they feel stuck, and generate a greater sense of understanding. As mentioned above, I use the Gottman relationship check-up assessment which helps me see exact areas of concern.

Couples therapy can dramatically change the quality of your relationship and your life. Call for your 20-minute free consultation or schedule your call here.

You CAN have an extraordinary life, and you don’t have to do it alone.